Pinkaholiclydia.blogspot.com : Dear BLOG

Hello everyone who know Nicky Boy, my boy!

150520 is a remarkable day for all of us, Nicky has passed and I think he is ready to face the death (although I am still not ready for his death).

This will be a letter to my boy, my little angel and I know I'd updated in instagram. Just want to update it at every single platform including my journal later on.

Dear Boy,

You have a name, Nicky and all of us just love to call you boy as in your name was just boy. You are tiny and skinny. My friend used to say I tortured you and never give you food, but you are just what you are. You ran and barked (no longer last 2 years ago when you became weak) at things, your high curiosity make us laughed everytime coz you will just bark at lizard on the wall as in you calling the lizard to come down. You will also bark at people but you are kind that you don't bite. People tend to scare of you because you bark at them fiercely but you are the kindness dog (I used to refer you as human) in my heart. You wouldn't bite at all, unless you are totally frighten or afraid of something.

Neighbours used to complain about how noisy you are but you seem understand and getting lesser on the barking part. You understand what we said everytime and will pay attention on what we said everytime, a little supervisor aka busybody in the house. Walking around the house and trying to be the supervisor of everyone. You win!

We used to say you are so cute that you listen to what we gossip about, especially when we talked about you. You will stare with your cute eyes at us. How cute is that. And your smile is the best, although they said you are just thirsty but I believe you are smiling at us.

You have camera shy or you just too excited when come to taking picture. Getting a nice picture took a lot longer and effort, hence less picture for you. If I know this will happen, I will get a trail of your growing up pictures, but we can't go back to what we'd lost and appreciate the current phase of life. I miss you so much!

14.5 years is a long dog life, but I just couldn't accept the fact that we need to face this reality so soon. It just getting to used to how life going on in this family. Sis always told me to face the reality that you will leave us real soon, and after Milky passed she assured me that you will leave us real soon. You are already a strong boy that have a rather longer life compared to her (5 months longer), you are really great and I love you.

I also feel grateful that you have passed when I am in the middle of this CMCO lockdown thingy! You let me see you for the last time and I still miss you. You know I somehow have auditory hallucination that you are crying in pain just now after you passed. I told momi that I think I heard you crying and momi assured me that she also heard that. We miss you so much and please let go of your pain and to the heaven. Hope I couldn't see you in 7th day and I wish you let us see you in very obvious way.

Boy, we still reminiscing of your pictures and videos that make us laugh so much. How cute you were past few years until you got really sick these few days. You have showed us how brave you overcome the few sickness that you had for the past few years and you make it until today. We don't want you to suffer anymore, we love you and we hope you become the happiest angle in the heaven!

Boy, I think Lucky felt you'd passed, she went in the house and lay down on the floor with a sad face. I know she can be very fierce on you, don't blame her because she jealous on how we treated you when you are sick. She just being too jealousy but she is also very kind at the same time. She loves you too. Your very best friend in the house and you both always sit together and you love to follow her around. I know this is how you show your kindness to her. You both make me laugh sometimes but she left alone now after your passed but it's alright we are still there with you both. Little angel!

This is the first picture we'd for you and you was like 3 or 4 years old.

You came to us on 2 days after momi's birthday (1/22/2006) and passed 2 days before momi and papa's wedding anniversary (5/15/2020). Is this what you want us to remember you? I will always remember you no matter where you have gone to.

You will always be our little angel in heart and you can go and find Odie (introduce you another little angel in heaven that gone 15 years ago).

You see how fun you are when you with your "best" buddy Lucky?

The day when momi feed both of you, you both were so eager to get your piece of meat. I love seeing your face, looking at momi eagerly.

Gathering day

I think this is also last year when we have gathering with aunty and uncle one random day. You just too cute not to take picture of it. You just randomly came in to supervise everyone of us then went out to your usual place and sleep.

Your face look old but you are the cutest!

Sunbathing few years ago

Your hair as usual less but this time momi choose to cut for you and you looks so awfully sad with the haircut. You were so fat and strong those days, sleeping on the floor and your leg and hand like this. It's a rare case but I love it.

The usual way of sleeping

I don't know why you look at the camera like this but you used to sleep like this.. curl like a cinnamon roll and sleep peacefully. And you will always turn and turn and turn (like mary-go-round) only you lay down at your most comfortable way.

But you were too weak last two days then you keep fell down when you turn it. Heartbreak by looking at it my little angel.

2017

You used to have skin disease (so you know why momi love to cut your hair now!?) but you are still the cutest I have seen. You will still give big smile when you see all of us here. This is taken when I'm having some study week or something (or jobless!?) daysss.

You always hard to selfie with but I still force you too. I'm sorry.

"You want to fight is it"

I can't remember when this was taken but I laughed when I view this picture. Your resting-bitch-face somehow make my day.

Shit! Now I heard your voice *auditory hallucination again*

This is when Lucky waiting for you to left over your food.

She used to look at you when you are having your food because she wished that you left over for her. So cute right!? But no more sharing after you are sick and I think she got kinda jealous a bit on the food portion. It's alright, she will get her share.

See! This is what I said, you both will sleep "together"

Lucky doesn't like you to bother her but you somehow always love her more than yourself, so here the way you accompany her. LOL

Christmas 2019

This is the last Christmas we had together and you as a Santa Claus of the house. Momi bought this shirt so that you are able to wear it during Christmas time and apparently it doesn't fit you so modified a bit lah. I know it is kinda weird but you still happy with it.

Some random happy day of you.

I guess this is the only perfect picture of me and you.

You don't like take picture especially you can't really stand still for a picture. Too excited on everything but you look super cute here!! I love how your tongue stick to your nose.

This is when insta is on trend 2013!

The picture quality wasn't that great back then but it's still alright to post a picture of you, my little angel. I don't regret of posting and felt grateful that at least I got picture of you before year 2015.

I'll always remember the happiest moment with you.

I'll remember how I used to carry you while doing homework, how you used to really excited when we went to the kitchen (your young sleeping place), how you will smile at us excitedly, how you always busybody around, how you supervise everyone in the house, how you get mad at papa when he hits your head badly, how you forgive everyone if they hit your head (we always say sorry to him sincerely), how you have forgive papa after he said sorry to you (you never ever bark or chase after him anymore), how you always follow Lucky, how you always so sweet and smiling.........

And how you passed....

You are the best angel in our heart.

You are brave and you never struggle so much when you passed.. I believe you'd ready to go for it (although I still struggle to accept it), ready to say goodbyes to everyone of us...

I love and miss you so muchhhhhh

You are always loved and never forgotten. Rest easy, Boy!